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sgt stutter Server Admin
Joined: 12 Apr 2002 Location: Southern CA Guild: <eVa> & V$ Posts: 2866
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Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2003 1:46 pm Post subject: Snappy Answer |
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Snappy Answer #1:
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket, and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat she said,
"Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub."
Snappy Answer #2:
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?
" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."
Snappy Answer #3:
The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said. The kid replied,
"Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
Snappy Answer #4:
A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads "low bridge ahead." Before he knows it the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks around to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?"
The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."
And finally Snappy Answer#5:
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!" A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asks, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class does its best to stifle their laughter and snickering When silence is restored, the teacher smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and sweetly says
"Well, you'd just have to write with your other hand." _________________
click--><eVa>SuperGreg
R.I.P Trigger Happy |
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ROOFCUTTER Server Admin
Joined: 12 Aug 2001 Location: =USV= Posts: 9271
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Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2003 2:12 pm Post subject: |
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Here's mine, I said it to a lady on a cornor while I was waiting for the stop light.
She was jogging and stopped to tie her shoe. she was bent over with her rump towards me. as she turned and stood up I yelled out, "looks like a knotty (naughty) situation...she at first looked disgusted until she caught on to the play in words and she smiled and than ran off. _________________ Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering. |
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sharkbyte Ville Supporter
Joined: 16 Feb 2002 Location: Massachusetts Guild: ={jFf}-USV= & Ville $upporter Posts: 2887
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Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2003 2:48 pm Post subject: |
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Not bad....though you have to wonder about Roof's. _________________
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cobra Server Admin
Joined: 18 Apr 2002 Location: having fun with Loka and Tickles! Posts: 6806
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Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2003 3:20 pm Post subject: |
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hehe #5 is the best. _________________ PROUD TO BE A MEMBER OF =US-V= & VILLE $UPPORTER |
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The Nanite Server Admin
Joined: 26 Apr 2002 Location: lost Posts: 6606
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Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2003 3:27 pm Post subject: |
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sharkbyte wrote: |
Not bad....though you have to wonder about Roof's. |
told ya ROOF liked to suck arse... _________________
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Replica Server Admin
Joined: 01 Jul 2002 Location: i'm a loner dottie, a rebel! Posts: 6144
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Posted: Tue Jul 22, 2003 4:56 pm Post subject: |
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io knew it! _________________ |
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