Imitation Poem

OSU Snipe Shocker · Posted: Mon May 13, 2002 9:51 pm Post subject: Imitation Poem

The poem is an imitation of a poem about a painting. The original was written about a painting that had a knight, a damsel and a dragon. this poem was written from the point of view of Adam and Eve in this painting by Titian

And here is the poem

I

I can't believe
they took the apple.
Oldest trick
in the book
She took the bait
Bit the apple.
Silly woman
Ruined the party
For all to come
I thought it funny
When she ate
That forbidden Fruit
The guy said no
Of course she didn't
As all women do
The man is wrong
The woman is right
Thats how it is
And ever will be.

II

Its just an apple
No more
No less
It tasted great
Succulent
Juicy
Simply the best apple
ever
Adam said no
What does he know
Hes merely a man
Uses the wrong
head
Thinks with it too
If you can call that
thinking
Its just an apple.

III

I told her not to
Honestly I did
Now I'm sleeping
On this sod sofa
Might as well be
a doghouse.
I tried to stop her
But my urge got the
better
I reached for her arm
but missed
Why not cop a feel
while the opportunity
is there
She slapped me then
and ate the apple
God was pissed
and kicked us out.

There ya have it
_________________
I WAS (back in august of 02) just better than you, thats all.

SpeCies · Posted: Mon May 13, 2002 11:15 pm Post subject:

OMG! For a second there I thought I was on the wrong page... Umm, Do
you play TFC in a skirt? LOL...... Sorry! I could not help it...

Ever see that movie "Robinhood- Men in Tights" This isn't how I want to
think of ourselves as... We have an image to maintain here.....
_________________
http://www.nosmacktards.com

OS · Posted: Tue May 14, 2002 1:31 am Post subject:

That Adam is one lucky guy...look where his left hand is...

The Nanite · Posted: Tue May 14, 2002 7:17 am Post subject:

Adam is lucky...Eve doesn't look like Omega's sig pic.

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BitterBeerFace · Posted: Tue May 14, 2002 1:22 pm Post subject:

LOL, how'd you find out about OSU's little habit of wearing a skirt around the house!? He's a sick one I tell ya!

Violent Pacifist · Posted: Tue May 14, 2002 1:26 pm Post subject:

Why is there a baby in the tree handing Eve the apple??? I thought it was supposed to be a snake that tempted her???

hoaxie · Posted: Tue May 14, 2002 1:33 pm Post subject:

Think of the symbolism in that. What ultinmately comes of their fornication?
_________________

LONG LIVE THE 'VILLE!

Computer · Posted: Tue May 14, 2002 1:34 pm Post subject:

Hmm you think there would be two children there

Cain and Abel
_________________
"Don't be so humble - you are not that great."

hoaxie · Posted: Tue May 14, 2002 1:41 pm Post subject:

They only had one at a time. But, it is symbolic (perhaps) for the fact that fornication or "original sin" creates children. You know the whole idea of some religions that children are born with original sin? yeah...

But, symbolism can be very tricky.

_________________

LONG LIVE THE 'VILLE!

BitterBeerFace · Posted: Tue May 14, 2002 1:52 pm Post subject:

*slowly backs away from the religious discussion*

We wouldn't want to get OSU's skirt wearing(hehehe) poetry thread locked now would we?

Snaggletooth · Guest

I bet he looks fine in heels....

OSU Snipe Shocker · Posted: Tue May 14, 2002 2:09 pm Post subject:

Thanks BBF.

Lets see if I can find the original poem, and the painting...

*goes to google*

here be the poem...

Not my Best Side
I

Not my best side, I'm afraid.
The artist didn't give me a chance to
Pose properly, and as you can see,
Poor chap, he had this obsession with
Triangles, so he left off two of my
Feet. I didn't comment at the time
(What, after all, are two feet
To a monster?) but afterwards
I was sorry for the bad publicity.
Why, I said to myself, should my conqueror
Be so ostentatiously beardless, and ride
A horse with a deformed neck and square hoofs?
Why should my victim be so
Unattractive as to be inedible,
And why should she have me literally
On a string? I don't mind dying
Ritually, since I always rise again,
But I should have liked a little more blood
To show they were taking me seriously.

II

It's hard for a girl to be sure if
She wants to be rescued. I mean, I quite
Took to the dragon. It's nice to be
Liked, if you know what I mean. He was
So nicely physical, with his claws
And lovely green skin, and that sexy tail,
And the way he looked at me,
He made me feel he was all ready to
Eat me. And any girl enjoys that.
So when this boy turned up, wearing machinery,
On a really dangerous horse, to be honest
I didn't much fancy him. I mean,
What was he like underneath the hardware?
He might have acne, blackheads or even
Bad breath for all I could tell, but the dragon--
Well, you could see all his equipment
At a glance. Still, what could I do?
The dragon got himself beaten by the boy,
And a girl's got to think of her future.

III

I have diplomas in Dragon
Management and Virgin Reclamation.
My horse is the latest model, with
Automatic transmission and built-in
Obsolescence. My spear is custom-built,
And my prototype armour
Still on the secret list. You can't
Do better than me at the moment.
I'm qualified and equipped to the
Eyebrow. So why be difficult?
Don't you want to be killed and/or rescued
In the most contemporary way? Don't
You want to carry out the roles
That sociology and myth have designed for you?
Don't you realize that, by being choosy,
You are endangering job prospects
In the spear- and horse-building industries?
What, in any case, does it matter what
You want? You're in my way.

-- U. A. Fanthorpe

*goes back to find the picture*

[/img]
_________________
I WAS (back in august of 02) just better than you, thats all.

BitterBeerFace · Posted: Tue May 14, 2002 6:54 pm Post subject:

Someone call the ASPCA! That poor dragon is being tortured by the white male lacky of a sadistic animal testing company! Can you say "Lance envy"...

Ok, it's almost 8pm, I really need to get away from work, my posts are starting to look rather spam-ish...