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John Doe
Server Admin
Joined: 12 Aug 2001
Location: Edmonton, AB
Posts: 4979
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 Posted: Sun Aug 31, 2003 10:35 am Post subject: JD's Joke of the day.... |
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A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected a quart of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee, and a 1 lb. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. He said, "You must be single."
The woman, a bit startled but intrigued by the derelict's intuition, looked at her six items on the belt. Seeing nothing particularly unusual about her selections she said, "Well, you know what, you're absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?"
The drunk replied, "'Cause you're ugly." 
No this isnt a true story and no I didnt substitute the drunk with JD....well maybe but I will never admit it. |
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Stevo
Ville Supporter
Joined: 08 Dec 2002
Location: Orange County Guild: TVR
Posts: 9514
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ROOFCUTTER
Server Admin
Joined: 12 Aug 2001
Location: =USV=
Posts: 9271
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| Posted: Sun Aug 31, 2003 12:54 pm Post subject: |
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Wasn't going to comment this time...but that was bad as jokes go....
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Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering. |
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N|kamichi
Registered User
Joined: 01 Jul 2003
Location: New York
Posts: 119
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| Posted: Sun Aug 31, 2003 1:23 pm Post subject: |
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This is a true story...
A few months after his parents were divorced, little Joey passed by his mom's bedroom and saw her rubbing her body and moaning, "I need a man! I need a man!" Over the next couple of months, he saw her doing this several times.
One day, he came home from school and heard her moaning again. When he peeked into her bedroom, he saw a man on top of her. Little Joey ran into his room, took off his clothes, threw himself on his bed, started stroking himself, and moaned, "I need a bike! I need a bike!"
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Don't take life too seriously, no one makes it out alive. |
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Violent Pacifist
Registered User
Joined: 29 Dec 2001
Location: Ft. Worth, TX
Posts: 1776
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| Posted: Sun Aug 31, 2003 1:54 pm Post subject: |
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And Nikamichi knows this is a true story...how?  Me thinks Nikamichi is the kid 
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We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams. |
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OS
Registered User
Joined: 05 Nov 2001
Location: Sydney Guild: <TVB>
Posts: 1574
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| Posted: Mon Sep 01, 2003 5:50 am Post subject: |
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www.jokes.com
They're both on that |
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sharkbyte
Ville Supporter
Joined: 16 Feb 2002
Location: Massachusetts Guild: ={jFf}-USV= & Ville $upporter
Posts: 2887
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| Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2003 1:36 pm Post subject: |
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Pretty good, guys. Thanks.
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