ummmmm funny joke???

KillerRoofcutter · Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2002 10:18 am Post subject:

post your jokes here!

I hate you you hate me I chaces barney up a tree hit with a 4 by 4 then I kicked him out the door!

You hate me I hate you lets get together and kill barney with a great big shot gun !

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PICKACHU GOT OWNED!

Whybkuul · Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2002 10:26 am Post subject:

A guy goes to his doctor because he’s been having problems remembering things. After a battery of tests the doctor says, "Unfortunately, I have bad news, and I have very bad news."

"What’s the very bad news?" the man asks warily.

"Well," says the doctor, "our tests show that you have cancer and only have three weeks to live."

"Oh, my God!" says the man. "Well, what’s the bad news?"

"Our tests indicate that you also have Alzheimer’s disease," says the doc.

"Well, I can always look on the bright side," says the man. "At least I don’t have cancer!"

Whybkuul · Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2002 10:38 am Post subject:

LMAO at this one!

A man walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist for a pack of condoms. Paying for them, he bursts into laughter and walks out of the store. The next day he comes in again, again buys condoms, and again walks out laughing. Thinking this is somewhat strange, the pharmacist asks his assistant to follow the man if he comes back. Sure enough, the man comes in the next day and walks out laughing. This time the assistant goes after him, returning 20 minutes later.

"So did you follow him?" asks the pharmacist.

"Yup."

"Where did he go?"

"Your house."

Whybkuul · Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2002 10:47 am Post subject:

k, this one is p.g. (it'll be my last too, i think i've spammed enuf)

A man meets a pirate in a bar. The pirate has a peg leg, a hook, and an eye patch. The man couldn’t help but ask, “How did you get the peg leg?”
“We were in a storm at sea,” replies the pirate, “and I was swept overboard into a school of sharks, one of which bit my leg off.”

“Wow! What about your hook?” the man asks.

“We were boarding an enemy ship, and battled the other sailors with swords, one of whom cut off my hand,” replies the pirate.

“Incredible! What happened to your eye?” asks the man.

“A seagull dropping fell into it,” replies the pirate.

“You lost your eye to a seagull dropping?” the man asks incredulously.

The pirate shrugged. “Yeah, it was my first day with the hook.”

KillerRoofcutter · Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2002 11:23 am Post subject:

See a nade on the ground pick it up and you will die see that same nade lieing on the ground with bodyparts on the ground........ Hmmmmmmmmmm Woops me dead!

_________________

PICKACHU GOT OWNED!

KillerRoofcutter · Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2002 11:23 am Post subject:

haaaaaaa got one

Tic Tak Toe 3 in a row barbie got shot by a Gijoe took her to the doctor woops barbies dead I cut of her head!

ha ha Hate barbies.

See a nade on the ground pick it up and you will die see that same nade lieing on the ground with bodyparts on the ground........ Hmmmmmmmmmm Woops me dead!

_________________

PICKACHU GOT OWNED!

KillerRoofcutter · Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2002 11:24 am Post subject:

See a redneck do not care cuz you are dead frin his sword! See a redneck shot him quick! Cuz if you don't cya in hell!

_________________

PICKACHU GOT OWNED!

KillerRoofcutter · Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2002 11:27 am Post subject:

Ok 5 people go to hell the first man says Hey why am I here? Cuz you shot your self dumb person!

The second guy comes in and says Where am I i was just in the doctors office bleeding from my mouth.

The third guy walks in and says Why am I here I was just on TFC with a rocket in my face!

The fourth guy comes in and says hey why am I here last thing I saw I was at pizza hut.

The last guy walks in and says This pizza hut I orderd a large rocket pizza.

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PICKACHU GOT OWNED!

KillerRoofcutter · Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2002 11:41 am Post subject:

Me killer you dier Me shot you you can't shot me you chicken me hunter u just died!

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PICKACHU GOT OWNED!

Snaggletooth · Guest

ALL FEAR THE CHICKEN HUNTER KROOF!

MuLiShA · Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2002 12:17 pm Post subject:

A guy goes to no costume party with no costume. The butler at the door says he can't go in without a costume on. The man goes and takes everything off except his pants. He goes back and the butler asks what he is. The man replies, "I'm a premature ejaculation in pants."

thewz · Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2002 12:19 pm Post subject:

A man walks into a bar during the great depression. He asks the bartender to buy a round of drinks for everyone. The bartender asks the man how he is planning on paying for this, so the man pulls out a wad of cash and hands it over to him. The bartender is amazed at the amount of cash that he has so he asks the man "How did you make all that money?"
"Well, I'm a proffesional gambler, of course."
"Oh really?"
"Yes, I make bets when I am sure that I will win."
"Wow," replies the bartender
"How about this, I bet you that I can bite my left eye, for 50 bucks."
"You're on!"
So the man pulls out his glass eye, and bites it.
"Damn you cheated!"
"Haha like I said, I only gamble when I am sure I will win"
The bartender hands over his 50 bucks, and then the man asks him, "How about I bet you that I can bite my right eye, for 100 bucks"
The bartender is sure that he doesn't have 2 glass eyes, so he agrees. The man then pulls out his false teeth, and bites his right eye. The bartender hands him over 100 dollars, and then says "No more bets for me tonight, but some guys are playing poker in the back room, if you wanna play"
"Thanks, I'll do that." The man walks away from the bar and goes into the backroom. He comes out 3 hours later, piss drunk. He walks up to the bartender and says in a slurred voice "I bet you 1000 bucks that I can piss into that empty vodka bottle behind the bar, without spilling a drop!"
The bartender, seeing that the man can barely walk in a straight line agrees to the bet. Sure enough, the man unzips his pants. He pisses all over the bartender and his bar, but not one drop lands in the vodka bottle.
The bartender breaks out laughing and says "HA! that was horrible! you owe me 1000 bucks!!"
"That's alright, replies the man, I just bet 15,000 dollars with the guys in the back room that I could piss all over you and your bar and still make you laugh

[ This Message was edited by: the_avenger on 2002-03-09 12:21 ]

Goldom · Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2002 12:23 pm Post subject:

roof, i think your son is drunk.

thewz · Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2002 12:27 pm Post subject:

I agree. Ok boys! time to get out the rytalin!

KillerRoofcutter · Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2002 12:30 pm Post subject:

ummmmm drunk what is that I can't walk straight! LOL!

_________________

PICKACHU GOT OWNED!