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Kahlan Amnell Queen of Spam
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Joined: 20 Jan 2004 Location: work...ahhhhh Posts: 3424
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Posted: Tue Feb 17, 2004 8:06 pm Post subject: Hungry Monkey |
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A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink
and while he's drinking the monkey jumps all around all over the
place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them,
then grabs some sliced limes and eats them, then jumps on the
pool table, grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and
swallows it whole.
The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey
just did?"
The guy says, "No what?"
"He just ate the cue ball off my pool table, whole!" Says the
bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the patron. "He eats
everything in sight. I will pay for the cue ball and stuff." He
finishes his drink, pays his bill and leaves.
Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and he has his monkey
with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around
the bar again. While the man is drinking his drink, the monkey
finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up
his butt, pulls it out, and eats it.
The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did
now?" He asks.
"Now what?" Responds the patron.
"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, then pulled it
out and ate it!" says the barkeep.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the patron. "He still
eats everything in sight, but ever since he ate that blasted cue
ball he measures everything first!" |
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Speaker's Xeno Registered User
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Joined: 04 Oct 2003 Location: chaos Posts: 3307
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Posted: Tue Feb 17, 2004 8:16 pm Post subject: |
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...thats pretty much how my face was when i was reading this...in that order _________________ [img]http://users.tvr-guild.org/speaker/speakersays.php[/img]
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Stevo Ville Supporter
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Joined: 08 Dec 2002 Location: Orange County Guild: TVR Posts: 9514
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Kahlan Amnell Queen of Spam
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Joined: 20 Jan 2004 Location: work...ahhhhh Posts: 3424
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Posted: Tue Feb 17, 2004 9:41 pm Post subject: |
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A rather well-proportioned secretary, Joan, spent almost all of her vacation sunbathing on the roof of her hotel. She wore a bathing suit the first day but, on the second, she decided that no one could see her way up
there, and she slipped out of it for an overall tan. She'd hardly begun when she heard someone running up the stairs; she was lying on her
stomach, so she just pulled a towel over her rear. "Excuse me, miss," said
the flustered little assistant manager of the hotel, out of breath from
running up the stairs. "The Hilton doesn't mind you sunbathing on the roof
but we would very much appreciate you wearing a bathing suit as you did
yesterday." "What difference does it make?" Joan asked rather almly. "No
one can see me up here, and besides, I'm covered with a towel." "Not
exactly," said the embarrassed little man. "You're lying on the dining
room skylight." |
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Jfet Zener Server Admin
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Joined: 19 Feb 2003
Posts: 3353
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Posted: Tue Feb 17, 2004 10:01 pm Post subject: Re: Hungry Monkey |
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[HALO] Mrs. Keyes wrote: | but ever since he ate that blasted cue
ball he measures everything first!" |
OH MAN!!! so funny!! so damn funny. |
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Kahlan Amnell Queen of Spam
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Joined: 20 Jan 2004 Location: work...ahhhhh Posts: 3424
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Posted: Wed Feb 18, 2004 12:19 am Post subject: Re: Hungry Monkey |
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Jfet Zener wrote: | [HALO] Mrs. Keyes wrote: | but ever since he ate that blasted cue
ball he measures everything first!" |
OH MAN!!! so funny!! so damn funny. |
imagine the noise as it comes out of testing... plip |
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Jfet Zener Server Admin
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Joined: 19 Feb 2003
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Posted: Wed Feb 18, 2004 12:26 am Post subject: Re: Hungry Monkey |
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[HALO] Mrs. Keyes wrote: | Jfet Zener wrote: | [HALO] Mrs. Keyes wrote: | but ever since he ate that blasted cue
ball he measures everything first!" |
OH MAN!!! so funny!! so damn funny. |
imagine the noise as it comes out of testing... plip |
is this experience talking? |
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Speaker's Xeno Registered User
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Joined: 04 Oct 2003 Location: chaos Posts: 3307
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Posted: Wed Feb 18, 2004 12:48 am Post subject: |
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![#Rofl](images/smiles/new_rofl.gif) _________________ [img]http://users.tvr-guild.org/speaker/speakersays.php[/img]
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