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funny stuff

 
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Smegma
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PostPosted: Mon Apr 11, 2005 9:18 pm    Post subject: funny stuff Reply with quote

this is funny and again hope it wasn`t already posted


Subject: upgrade 7.0 to wife 1
>
>
> > To Technical Support:
> >
> > Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that
> > the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of
> > space and valuable resources. No mention of this phenomenon was
> > included in the product brochure. In addition, Wife 1.0 installs itself
> > into
> > all other programs and launches during system initialisation, where it
> > monitors all other system activity.
> >
> > Applications such as Pokernight 10.3, Drunken Boys Night 2.5 and
> > Saturday Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected.
> > I can not seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run
> > some of my other favourite applications. I am thinking about going back to
> > Girlfriend 7.0, but un-install does not work on this program.
> >
> > Can you help me, please? Otherwise, I'm screwed.
> >
> > Thanks
> >
> > Dear Joe Screwed:
> >
> > This is a very common problem men complain about but is mostly due to a
> > primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0
> > with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a "UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT"
> > program.
> >
> > Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by its creator to run
> > everything.
> > It is unlikely you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert
> > back to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating files within your system would
> > cause Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing is gained.
> >
> > It is impossible to un-install, delete, or purge the program files
> > from the system once installed. You can not go back to Girlfriend 7.0
> > because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this. Some have tried to install
> > Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than the original
> > system. Look in your manual under "Warnings-Alimony /Child Support."
> >
> > I recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and just deal with the situation.
> > Having Wife 1.0 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire
> > section regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume all
> > responsibility for faults and problems that might occur, regardless of
> > their
> > cause. The best course of action will be to enter the command C:\APOLOGISE.
> > In any case avoid excessive use of the "Esc" key because ultimately you
> > will
> > have to give the APOLOGISE
> > command before the operating system will return to normal. The system will
> > run smooth as long as you take the blame for all the GPFs. Wife 1.0 is a
> > great program, but very high maintenance.
> >
> > Consider buying addition software to improve the performance of Wife
> > 1.0. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Chocolates 5.0. Do not, under any
> > circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a
> > supported application for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible
> > damage to the operating system.
> >
> > Best of luck, Tech Support
> >
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Speaker's Xeno
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PostPosted: Tue Apr 12, 2005 12:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

hahaha
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Bright Red Nipples
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PostPosted: Tue Apr 12, 2005 3:40 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I've seen it a long time ago but still funny as hell. My boss (wife) doesn't think it funny
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