[sgt stutter]

Another blonde joke

A redhead walks into a sports bar around 9:58 PM. She sits down next to this blonde at the bar and stares up at the TV. The 10:00 news was on.

The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a large building preparing to jump. The redhead turns to the blonde and says, "You know, I bet he'll jump."

The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't." The redhead placed $20 dollars on the bar and said, "You're on!"

Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy did a swan dive off of the building, falling to his death. The blonde was very upset and handed her $20 dollars to the redhead and said, "All is fair. Here is your money."

The redhead replies, "Honey, I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5 o'clock news and knew he would jump."

The blonde replies, "I did too, but I didn't think he'd do it again.

_________________________________________________


The amazing Claude

It was opening night at the Orpheum and The Amazing Claude was topping
the bill. People came from miles around to see the famed hypnotist do
his stuff.

As Claude took to the stage, he announced, "Unlike most stage hypnotists
who invite two or three people up onto the stage to be put into a trance,
I intend to hypnotize each and every member of this audience."

The excitement was almost electric as Claude withdrew a beautiful
antique pocket watch from his coat.

"I want you each to keep your eye on this antique watch. It's a very
special watch. It has been in my family for six generations,"

Then he began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly
chanting,"Watch the watch, watch the watch, watch the watch."

The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light
gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed
the swaying watch, until suddenly it slipped from the hypnotist's fingers and fell to the floor,
breaking into a hundred pieces. "Shit!" said The Amazing Claude.

It took three weeks to clean up the theater.
_________________

click--><eVa>SuperGreg

R.I.P Trigger Happy

[Mongoose_Slayer]

[GoldenSpy]

where do you get all these jokes?