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Bada Bing Registered User
Joined: 17 Sep 2001 Location: Pioneer,Ca. Guild:-TPF- Posts: 3054
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Posted: Sun May 25, 2003 8:45 pm Post subject: North of the border JOKES |
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A Little Canadian Humor
CANADIAN JOKE #1
After the North American Beer Festival, all the brewery presidents decided to go out for a beer. The guy from Corona sits down and says, "Hey Senor, I would like the world's best beer, a Corona." The bartender dusts off a bottle from the shelf and gives it to him. The guy from Budweiser says, "I'd like the best beer in the world, give me 'The King Of Beers', a Budweiser." The bartender gives him one. The guy from Coors says, "I'd like the only beer made with Rocky Mountain spring water, give me a Coors." He gets it. The guy from Molson sits down and says, "Give me a Coke." The bartender is a little taken aback, but gives him what he ordered. The other brewery presidents look over at him and ask, "Why aren't you drinking a Molson's?" The Molson president replies, "Well, I figured if you guys aren't drinking beer, neither would I."
CANADIAN JOKE #2
A Canadian is walking down the street with a case of beer under his arm. His friend Doug stops him and asks, "Hey Bob! Whacha get the case of beer for?" "I got it for my wife, eh." answers Bob. "Oh!" exclaims Doug, "Good trade."
CANADIAN JOKE #3
An Ontarian wanted to become a Newfie. He went to the neurosurgeon and asked, "Is there anything you can do to me that would make me into a Newfie?" "Sure it's easy." replied the neurosurgeon. "All I have to do is cut out 1/3 of your brain, and you'll be a Newfie." He was very pleased, and immediately underwent the operation. However, the neurosurgeon's knife slipped, and instead of cutting 1/3 of the patient's brain, the surgeon accidentally cut out 2/3 of the patient's brain. He was terribly remorseful, and waited impatiently beside the patient's bed as the patient recovered from the anesthetic. As soon as the patient was conscious, the neurosurgeon said to him "I'm terribly sorry, but there was a ghastly accident. Instead of cutting out 1/3 of your brain, I accidentally cut out 2/3 of your brain." The patient replied "Qu'est-ce que vous avez dit, monsieur?"
CANADIAN JOKE #4
One day an Englishman, an American, and a Canadian walked into a pub together. They proceeded to each buy a pint of Labatt Blue. Just as they were about to enjoy their beverages, three flies landed in each of their pints.
The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust. The American fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it as if nothing happened. The Canadian picked the fly out of his drink and started shaking it over the pint, yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT!" _________________
Are you threatening me ???
Last edited by Bada Bing on Mon May 26, 2003 10:40 am; edited 1 time in total |
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JuVaNiLe Registered User
Joined: 10 Aug 2002 Location: A Boring Town In A Boring State Posts: 1926
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Posted: Sun May 25, 2003 9:15 pm Post subject: |
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l0l except i dont get number 3 maybe its cuz im not a candian |
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Stevo Ville Supporter
Joined: 08 Dec 2002 Location: Orange County Guild: TVR Posts: 9514
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Turbo! Registered User
Joined: 05 Jan 2002 Location: Mt. Vernon, Wa Guild: TVR Posts: 1395
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Posted: Sun May 25, 2003 11:07 pm Post subject: |
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i think its that it made him french canadian? _________________
*Props to Mad-Hammer on the Sig*
R.I.P. Blue: Gone But Never Forgotten |
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Smegma Ville Supporter
Joined: 26 Feb 2003 Location: Ryder Lake,BC Guild:<eVa>FM Posts: 685
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Posted: Sun May 25, 2003 11:34 pm Post subject: |
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u got it turbo made him a quebec errrrrrr.
funny stuff _________________
RIP- BlueRuler |
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Turbo! Registered User
Joined: 05 Jan 2002 Location: Mt. Vernon, Wa Guild: TVR Posts: 1395
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Posted: Sun May 25, 2003 11:37 pm Post subject: |
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HA HA! I WINZ _________________
*Props to Mad-Hammer on the Sig*
R.I.P. Blue: Gone But Never Forgotten |
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SpeCies Registered User
Joined: 05 Sep 2001 Location: North Carolina Guild: <TVB> Posts: 1948
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`RaphX Registered User
Joined: 24 Mar 2002
Posts: 1556
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2003 7:25 am Post subject: |
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#3 is funny |
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Stevo Ville Supporter
Joined: 08 Dec 2002 Location: Orange County Guild: TVR Posts: 9514
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2003 9:53 am Post subject: |
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Turbo! wrote: | i think its that it made him french canadian? |
That's what I thought at first because it looked like french. I wasn't sure, though. _________________
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sharkbyte Ville Supporter
Joined: 16 Feb 2002 Location: Massachusetts Guild: ={jFf}-USV= & Ville $upporter Posts: 2887
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Posted: Mon May 26, 2003 5:49 pm Post subject: |
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And here I thought the funniest part was that the guys were Canadian. But, sheesh, you gotta make fun of them to. They can't help it if they were born Canadian. We should be supportive of them, and help them try to better themselves, or else they might become something even worse.....French.
_________________
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